Blue Christmas

by Rev. Max Blalock

Last year, a few days before Christmas, I received a phone call from a friend. Now, here in the midst of the holidays, we are supposed to be hearing good news, wishes of good cheer, greetings of “Merry Christmas!” and “Happy Holidays!” It’s not supposed to be the type of news that this phone call brought. It was the news that a dear friend of ours was dying. He had suffered a massive heart attack, and his wife was choosing to make the decision to let him go and give others life by donating his organs. You see, my friend was a man in his thirties, and his wife is in her twenties: far too early for dying and for being a widow. But here it is, right in the midst of “the most wonderful time of the year.” What do we do with our grief and our sadness in the midst of the time of year that we are supposed to be the happiest? How do we love and care for one another when the holidays serve only to remind us of who or what we have lost? When we don’t bring have any sense of real joy and happiness? We dare. We dare to be with ourselves and with each other in the midst of the grief and the sorrow. We dare to let the darkness and the silence of the season be made just as holy as the light and the singing. We dare to be like a God who dared to come down and meet us just as we are and right where we are, and do the same with one another. We don’t ignore it. We dare to trust God, ourselves, and those closest to us to join us in this time of grief and sorrow.

It is said that the German priest Martin Luther never told the Christmas story without including the story of the massacre of the infants by Herod and his soldiers. He believed that in order to be true to his faith and life, he could never ignore the pain and suffering that is ever a part of this world and our lives. We would do well to do the same. During this season of celebration, let us not neglect ourselves and our friends and family who happen to be grieving instead of celebrating this season. Only through journeying together can we get to the deeper meaning of this season, which is not happiness or celebration, but hope, faith, and love, three gifts that only come through sharing our lives in genuine community with one another. So this season, let us commit ourselves to visiting or calling those in our community who may be lonely or grieving. Let us commit ourselves to reaching out for love and community if we are grieving or lonely. Then we will experience Emmanuel, God with us, as we embody and share God’s love, grace, and compassion with one another.

Rev. Max Blalock, Campus Minister at The Wesley Foundation, the United Methodist Campus Ministry at The College of William and Mary

email: mwblalock@wm.edu
phone: 757-229-6832